Well, today is Friday, February 20th, 2026, and I am sorry that I am a day late. I was supposed to publish last night at the latest and it didn’t happen. My husband Bill left for New Jersey early Tuesday morning and came back Thursday afternoon. Even though it was only a few days, I did miss him. I left work on Thursday and then drove directly to Walgreen’s to pick up some medications. I went through the drive through, and it took quite a bit longer than I had planned. I had hoped to be home by 6pm and that didn’t happen. Finally, I did arrive home. Bill usually cooks for us, but he was feeling tired after his six-hour drive home. So, we went out to a Japanese restaurant in our neighborhood. It was simply nice to spend an enjoyable dinner together in a comfortable environment.
I have been feeling a lot of growing pains lately. I have been working on my relationships in general and it isn’t always easy. I try not to assume, but of course I do assume sometimes. And I unfortunately find that when I do assume it makes me angry. I am really trying hard not to assume. I can’t get inside someone’s head. I don’t know what they’re thinking. My assumption is to think that they are acting a certain way because of me. What is more likely is that they are acting a certain way because of themselves. Their actions are directed by how they think and interpret the world. Why would I assume it has anything to do with me? And, even if it does have something to do with me, it is not about me. It is about them. It might even be directed at me, but it is not about me. It is about them and I need to try to remember that. I am not the center of the universe.
I had an interaction with a friend that was very negative. Really it was all my fault. I had acted a certain way because I took things personally and made assumptions. I accused this person of gossiping about me. I was 100% certain that I was right. Did I have any facts to base that on. No, I did not. It was all based on things I was taking personally and assuming about this person. Previously we did have a friendly relationship. We were not close, but we had amiable conversations. I was trying to look at it from their perspective. We had a friendship and suddenly, I accused them of gossiping about me. To them it came out of the blue.
They did not know what was going on with me. They were not aware of all these assumptions I was making about them. So, to them, it probably seemed like I was attacking them out of the nowhere. Now, that’s a hard pill to swallow. Now this person won’t communicate with me through text messages and will only talk to me in person with someone else present. I do feel hurt by this. Part of me thinks, has it really come to this? But then I must look at it from their perspective. We had a normal relationship and then without any warning I verbally attacked them. Would I want anything to do with someone who did that to me? If I had a friendship and that friend turned on me, would I want anything to do with them. Actually, if it was a good friend, depending on the circumstances, I would probably forgive them. But this friend and I were not close. We had a surface friendship. To expect them to want to continue the friendship is not realistic. They have already effectively cut me out of their life. That really says it all.
I am saddened by this. I didn’t mean for this to happen. I don’t know why I was so convinced they were gossiping about me. The result is that now we don’t have any relationship at all. Even if I do apologize to them, it won’t change what I had done. You can’t count on an apology to fix things. If you treat someone badly there are going to be consequences. And I did treat them very badly. I hate writing this. I really don’t want to treat anyone poorly. They didn’t deserve to be the brunt of my wrath. So, really all I can do is apologize. That’s the best action to take in this situation. I will need to chant a lot; with the hope I can do so sincerely and free of any bad feelings towards them.